I had always wanted to learn how to meditate, but had yet to be able to sit still for more than three at a time. My sister, Cadence, was so calm  and never seemed stressed about anything. And she managed to get everywhere on time. I’m still not sure how.  

I thought if I learned how to meditate, I could slow down my internal clock. I could hopefully find my shoes in the morning and maybe my clothes would even match. I felt like I was slowly getting better at sitting still, but at the end of three months I was only sitting still for five minutes at a time. But I guess it was better than nothing. As the months of meditation wore on, I started to feel lighter, to feel free. I wondered if it was the fact I had stopped talking as much or the fact I could finally sit still. Was it because I started listening more? 

The more I listened, the more I learned. And what I was learning was starting to surprise me. I now knew that Cadence didn’t actually meditate, but somehow had learned to fall asleep sitting with her back against the wall. She was so tired all the time because she was staying up most of the night trying to write her first novel. A novel I had found, read, and realized my sister had written the saddest story I had ever heard. It was the story of my life. 


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