I stared into his eyes and wanted to leave the party. Even though Grant and I had met three months ago, I am not confident he remembers my name. I longed for him to remember, to notice I was there. To know that I was noticing him. But here he was staring blankly at me like we had never seen me before. Though the longer I stared at him, I wondered if there was something else happening. It seemed as if his eyes were glazing over. Like he had taken something before he came to the party. No way. No way Grant could ever be doing any drugs. Right? He was too perfect to do anything like that. Too perfect to drink anything other than water and Coke. Yes.
From that day on, every time I left my house for a party or even dinner where there was a chance I could see him – everything came to a crashing halt. I knew I was obsessing, but I couldn’t stop. Unfortunately, I now had something else to obsess over. I needed to know what he was taking before he was going to parties? I needed to know what he was taking and where he was getting it. As I researched (obsessed?) more over Grant’s life, I began to wonder what I saw in him in the first place. But really, how do people live their lives when they are in love? Especially with someone in love who was their teacher.