Losing It

“I feel like I’m losing it.”  I felt my body start to shake as I stared at Cassie’s front door.  Had I really seen what I thought I had seen or was I making everything up?  I wanted to believe what I had seen, but how could it be true?  How could she be there one second and then the next second be gone? 

As I felt my heart beat faster, I forced myself to slog toward her house.  I needed to find out what was really going on or if I was losing my mind.  If I was losing my mind, it wouldn’t necessarily be the first time.  Or at least that’s what my family told me.  They liked to remind me of all the times they told me I had lost it, but half the time, I honestly had no idea what they were talking about.  I remembered having pizza for dinner, but everyone would tell me we had had spaghetti the night before. 

Or when I remembered a certain day of a vacation we all went on and everyone acted confused when I wanted to talk about it.  Now, I had been told by my family that my cousin Cassie had died in a mysterious accident several years before and I had been too traumatized to attend her funeral.  But here I was, somehow at Cassie’s front door, and there she was, standing in her living room.  Very much alive.  Was I crazy or were they lying?