The Calculus Teacher

I had been in love with my calculus teacher for as long as I could remember. I walked by his classroom as often as I could just to see if Mr. Williams happened to be standing out in the hallway. I practiced one-liners and jokes so I would have something to say to him. Something to get him to smile. But as much as I practiced and wanted to talk to him, I always lost any confidence in myself as soon as I saw him. 

A few times in my junior year of high school, I legitimately considered failing calculus solely so I could spend another year with Mr. Williams. But when another teacher was also hired to teach calculus, I decided it wasn’t worth the chance of getting a different teacher for my second time around. And my failure of calculus would tarnish Mr. Williams’ record and I could not have that. On the last day of the school year, I was determined to finally make my mark. To finally let Mr. Williams know how I felt about him. I couldn’t let the entire summer go by obsessing over how I missed my greatest chance to profess my love.  

“Angela, I hope you have a great summer. Maybe I’ll see you next year,” Mr. Williams called across the classroom when he noticed me dawdling. I mumbled unintelligibly as I ran to the door, tears filling my eyes. My name was Sarah. My greatest love didn’t even know my name.